I am sorry, so sorry!

There are chapters in our lives that we would love to be able to erase. Those awful things we said and those shameful things we did seem to forever hunt us down like a wounded animal surrounded by the deadly predators in the jungle of our condemnation. Why did I take that turn? Why did I get involved with this or that other person? Why did I not walk away? Why did I so, irresponsibly let my loved ones down? Why?


 

There are chapters in our lives that we would love to be able to erase. Those awful things we said and those shameful things we did seem to forever hunt us down like a wounded animal surrounded by the deadly predators in the jungle of our condemnation. Why did I take that turn? Why did I get involved with this or that other person? Why did I not walk away? Why did I so, irresponsibly let my loved ones down? Why?

 

The voices of our accusers refuse to be silent; they get louder and louder as our own guilt sounds the daily trumpet of our disqualifications. We saw the awful darkness of our own souls; the evil that fights in us conquered a great victory that day, a great victory that month and great victories for those many years. How can I ever move forward after what I did?

 

There are chapters in our lives that we would love to be able to erase. Those awful things we said and those shameful things we did seem to forever hunt us down like a wounded animal surrounded by the deadly predators in the jungle of condemnations. I want to be free from the chains of those dreadful memories! Is there anybody that can change the tragic song of my past? Is there anybody that can fix the melodies of my today?  Can someone give me the new song announcing hope for my tomorrow?

 

I am the one who betrayed HIM for a few dollars; I am the one who denied HIM three times on that morning; I am the one who yelled crucify him, even as I knew HE was an innocent man; I am the one who nailed HIM to the cross, I am the one who mocked HIM and I am the one who saw HIM dying. I am the one filled with fornications in many pages of my past; I am the one filled with violent acts and with terrifying destructive emotions that made a mark in this dimension of life. Guilty and more than guilty I am!

 

There are chapters in our lives that we would love to be able to erase. Those awful things we said and those shameful things we did seem to forever hunt us down like a wounded animal surrounded by the deadly predators in the jungle of our condemnation.  I am sorry, so sorry!

Author: angelcasiano

An independent thinker with a profound call to see the orthodoxy of the church and passion for Christ manifesting together. Angel was born in Brooklyn, New York in April of 1968, he was raised on the beautiful island of Puerto Rico where he earned his B.S. degree in Sociology with a minor in Education from the Inter American University in San Germán in 1991. That same year he moved to Jacksonville, Florida. After working construction jobs for a year and learning the English language, his first job working with foster-care children in the capacity of youth care worker was with Jacksonville Youth Sanctuary in September of 1992. With JYS he was promoted several times as group home supervisor, legal caseworker, and program director. While in Jacksonville, Angel studied a couple of martial arts styles. After earning his black belt, he became the founder of Good Fight Ministries as he used martial arts as an instrument to preach the gospel. In 2004 Angel was selected Martial Arts Instructor of the Year for the State of Florida and in 2005 Angel was inducted in the USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame where he also received the Christian Spirit Award. In July of 2005 Angel accepted his call to pastor a bilingual church in Winton, NC where he served for a couple of years. Five months later he lost his first wife to cancer in December of that same year. This initiated a deep valley of suffering in his life, a mountain of costly mistakes and the embracing of lifestyles of sin that are well documented through this blog. In August of 2012 Angel moved to Fairbanks Alaska with his wife Rayette Casiano and six children who are now adults. In Alaska, Angel continued his social work-related career and his ministry of preaching, teaching and writing. Angel is the author of two books, Hope for the divorcee: Forgiving and Moving Forward and 7 Banderas de Esperanza: La Bendición de Yokdzonot. In January 8th of 2020 Angel and his wife moved to Arizona.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s