I remember how strong I was during the day; I knew I needed to work to support my children. My job became therapy for me; it helped me to forget the pain I was going through; but when those nights came, I was miserable. The pain of losing my first wife Ileana was indescribable.
I tried drinking alcohol, but alcohol did nothing to me. God did not allow me to get drunk. I asked God to take away the pain I was feeling, but the pain was there; there was no way around it. Just like I attempted to medicate my pain with alcohol; I also attempted to medicate my pain with a second marriage. That was a mistake, and I paid the consequences for it.
You know, Jonah’s disobedience cause others to suffered; my disobedience did the same thing. After my divorce I live a life filled with regret. How could I do such thing? I was a pastor; I knew better. That regret, combined with depression accompanied me every night. As I was going through a divorce, I considered taking my own life; but the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said “Angel, I am not done with you!” Those words saved my life.
To be continued…