I remember how strong I was during the day; I knew I needed to work to support my children. My job became therapy for me; it helped me to forget the pain I was going through; but when those nights came, I was miserable. The pain of losing my first wife Ileana was indescribable.
I tried drinking alcohol, but alcohol did nothing to me. God did not allow me to get drunk. I asked God to take away the pain I was feeling, but the pain was there; there was no way around it. Just like I attempted to medicate my pain with alcohol; I also attempted to medicate my pain with a second marriage. That was a mistake, and I paid the consequences for it.
You know, Jonah’s disobedience cause others to suffered; my disobedience did the same thing. After my divorce I live a life filled with regret. How could I do such thing? I was a pastor; I knew better. That regret, combined with depression accompanied me every night. As I was going through a divorce, I considered taking my own life; but the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said “Angel, I am not done with you!” Those words saved my life.
To be continued…
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Published by angelcasiano
An independent thinker with a profound call to see the orthodoxy of the church and passion for Christ manifesting together. Angel was born in Brooklyn, New York in April of 1968, he was raised on the beautiful island of Puerto Rico where he earned his B.S. degree in Sociology with a minor in Education from the Inter American University in San Germán in 1991. That same year he moved to Jacksonville, Florida. After working construction jobs for a year and learning the English language, his first job working with foster-care children in the capacity of youth care worker was with Jacksonville Youth Sanctuary in September of 1992. With JYS he was promoted several times as group home supervisor, legal caseworker, and program director.
While in Jacksonville, Angel studied a couple of martial arts styles. After earning his black belt, he became the founder of Good Fight Ministries as he used martial arts as an instrument to preach the gospel. In 2004 Angel was selected Martial Arts Instructor of the Year for the State of Florida and in 2005 Angel was inducted in the USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame where he also received the Christian Spirit Award. In July of 2005 Angel accepted his call to pastor a bilingual church in Winton, NC where he served for a couple of years. Five months later he lost his first wife to cancer in December of that same year. This initiated a deep valley of suffering in his life, a mountain of costly mistakes and the embracing of lifestyles of sin that are well documented through this blog.
In August of 2012 Angel moved to Fairbanks Alaska with his wife Rayette Casiano and six children who are now adults. In Alaska, Angel continued his social work-related career and his ministry of preaching, teaching and writing. Angel is the author of two books, Hope for the divorcee: Forgiving and Moving Forward and 7 Banderas de Esperanza: La Bendición de Yokdzonot.
In January 8th of 2020 Angel and his wife moved to Arizona. On June 8th 2021 Angel started his home church, not as a starting point, but as a closer way to how the church is suppose to look like according to Scripture.
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