Adult Children Still Living at Home?

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At least one in two families in America have adults’ sons and daughters still at home with mama and papa.[1]The highest statistic peak of adult’s sons and daughter still living at home took place during the Great Depression era (1940s). The number was about 48%.[2] Currently we are at the highest ever, over 50% of adults’ children are still living with their parents. The claim is that,

The coronavirus outbreak has pushed millions of Americans, especially young adults, to move in with family members. The share of 18- to 29-year-olds living with their parents has become a majority since U.S. coronavirus cases began spreading early this year, surpassing the previous peak during the Great Depression era.[3]

This is an unavoidable topic. As a Pastor, I am concerned with the condition of people’s souls; the way we think, our decision-making and emotions. The following statistics are troubling to me,

Many parents of millennials (ages 25 to 34) are financially supporting their adult kids, paying some or all of their monthly expenses, including groceries, cell phone, and even costs related to owning a car. These parents are also paying for bigger ticket items, such as making rent and mortgage payments and paying down student loans. Roughly a quarter of millennials say they receive financial support from their parents in these areas, with 13% saying their parents pay all of their rent or mortgage. And 10% of millennials say their parents are shouldering the cost of their student loans.[4]

If you are a believer and you have adult children in your home and they are not paying rent, not helping around the house and, are more of a burden than a blessing, I have a few questions for you, what did you teach them? Where did all those church sermons and Bible studies went? What are you teaching them right now? I can ask what is in their heart, but I rather ask you, what is in your heart to make you think that it is perfectly ok to have a capable young adult in your house not helping with the bills and chores around the house? Again, what are you teaching them right now? Life is not free, and things don’t get clean on their own. If you are a part of the mentioned statistics, I have news for you… you are raising very selfish individuals. 

The Bible command us to “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 (ESV) What kind of training are you providing? Are you preparing your child for life? A foot ball player trains to be ready to perform in his sports, a boxer does the same, an MMA fighter, basketball player, etc. It does not matter how good they are, if they don’t train and show up the day of competition out of shape, they will not be able to perform, in some sports that means getting seriously hurt. In this life you will definitely get hurt with no tools to recover. 

When your child is lacking the parents’ training in the way they should live, they will grow up to hurt themselves, to hurt others and to hurt you. They will fall apart with the first uncomfortable emotion they face. 

You have adult children at home? Start by charging them rent and they most help around the house. Teach them to be blessing and not a burden wherever they go. They most understand that they don’t run that house either, the father and mother does; they MUST show respect. They need to understand they are no longer kids; if they insist in disrespect drop them off at the nearest Homeless Shelter. If he/she wants to come and go as he/she pleases; they need to get their own place; if they are under your roof they will have a curfew, etc. 

Beloved, if your child, who is now an adult, can keep a job and can pay his own rent and bills and is not embracing an unrighteous lifestyle… congratulation; you have done your job as a parent. However, if they are still living with you, can’t keep a job and are not helping around the house and, if you allow this to be, you are failing as apparent. The good news is… you can change that today.


[1] https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/09/04/a-majority-of-young-adults-in-the-u-s-live-with-their-parents-for-the-first-time-since-the-great-depression/

[2] https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/09/04/a-majority-of-young-adults-in-the-u-s-live-with-their-parents-for-the-first-time-since-the-great-depression/

[3] https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/09/04/a-majority-of-young-adults-in-the-u-s-live-with-their-parents-for-the-first-time-since-the-great-depression/

[4] https://www.cnbc.com/2019/05/02/how-many-millennials-get-help-from-their-parents-to-pay-rent-other-bills.html

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